Help my unbelief

Well, I'm officially done with school for this semester - THANK THE LORD! haha, it's been a LONG one. Looking back, I feel like I'm slowly beginning to see a pattern of my life and beliefs...through heartache, hard times, stressful days, and even the easy days. I've complained a lot...wallowed in some self-pity a lot...and allowed outward circumstances to dictate my worship. By that I mean that rather than worshipping the Lord God I believe created me and sustains me, I've been worshipping things like comfort and even myself. When times have been hard, I've wanted easy above all things, and been bitter when easy hasn't come. I see how much this has dictated my life.
In the past week or so, I feel like the Lord has been opening my eyes to so much of my own sin in this - It's like, as I've cried out to Him, angry and hurt, He's said "Look Becky, I have remained faithful through it all...you aren't believing the truth about me." And He has shown me.

"Therefore since we have been justified by faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ. through Him we have also obtained access by faith into this grace in which we stand and we rejoice in hope of the glory of God. More than that, we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces character, and character produces hope, and hope does not put us to shame, because God's love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us. For while we were still weak, at the right time Christ died for the ungodly...but God show his loves love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.  Since, therefore, we have now been justified by His blood, much more shall we be saved by him from the wrath of God. For if while we were enemies we were reconciled to God by the death of His Son, much more, now that we are reconciled, shall we be saved by His life. More than that, we also rejoice in God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have now recieved reconcilliation." - Romans 5:1-11

As elementary as it is...I think that I've forgotten and haven't truly believed that God LOVES me. I swung so far the other way, to God has a huge purpose for me, and I must fulfill it or I'm a failure. And of course, I've "failed," which has left me empty, sad, and bitter...with no motivation. But thats because I've missed the best part! God LOVES me! Like this passage says, He sent His Son to die for me, while I was His enemy, because He loved me that much...because He still loves me. He made a way for me to become His daughter. There is no greater love. The only reason I can love Him, is because He first loved me. If I miss this, the true purpose is gone. John Piper said "God is most glorified in us, when we are most satisfied in Him." What a beautiful and awesome statement!!! So often I fall into believing that I  must choose one or the other...to glorify God or to be satisfied. But the truth is that they come hand-in-hand...because He LOVES us. His purpose for us is not only His and about Him, but the greatest, most satisfying and joyful thing for US. This is the TRUTH, that upon believing, gives us more of Jesus and His purpose than any amount of working hard or being good could ever do. It wasn't meant to be earned...it was given. It is the heart-level motivation behind every action of worship, the driving force behind persevering and enduring, and the attitude that floods joy and peace into every circumstance, rendering the world powerless. This is the GOSPEL.

"Repent, and believe the Gospel." - Jesus Christ, Mark 1:15